A Shoulder to Cry On

Over the past few days, for no particular reason at all, I have been feeling an overwhelming need for a shoulder to cry on. I can't pinpoint a specific event that triggered this desire. I'm not especially sad, or especially worried, or especially upset about anything. Perhaps I am a little more tired than usual. But there's no real or legitimate reason for this need.

I suppose it's comfort that I'm craving, more than anything else. I keep thinking about how lovely it would be for someone strong and good and wise to lay my head on their shoulder, wrap their arms around me and remind me, just reassure me that all is well, that I'm alright, and that all manner of things will be fine. Sometimes I just get so tired of being and feeling alone, of putting on a brave face, of holding it all together. What a luxury it would be to just drop it all and let someone else keep the pieces in place for me, even if just a little while.

It is such a rare thing, to find someone who will allow you to cry. There aren't very many people who can witness someone else's tears without being afraid of them. In all my life I can only think of one person, one man, who has ever been able to be that for me, and right now he is so far away from me that he might as well be on another planet.

Tomorrow I will wake up and greet a day that is fresh and new. My smile will be in place. I will offer comfort and peace and rest to others in any way that I can. But tonight, I will let the tears flow freely as they will, and be grateful of the fact that no one can see them but me.