Remembering Our Wedding

A few weeks ago we received the following email from some friends of ours (who attended our wedding more than a year and half ago with three daughters in tow). Their eight year old was recently asked to write about a "wedding experience" and this is what she had to say:

"One of my dad's friends had the best wedding I have ever been to.  My friend Olivia also came.  We got one free toy each from a basket.  We played house under tables. Also we danced crazy by the elevators and danced with the bride .  We all got to ring bells when the bride and groom left.  I had so much fun.  We still see them sometimes like last night at a football game.  The bride's hair is red and she looked so pretty.  She is also so nice."

"Way to make a lasting impression!" our friend added below.

I love that. And while it was definitely our intention to have a kid-friendly wedding (and I think our "lasting impression" has something to do with that) I also think there's a whole lot more to it than that. A wedding is intended to be more than just a ceremony, more than just a celebration. It's also a mystery, and a holy union, and it invites us to a deeper love, and it calls us to a higher place. It's both a picture and a promise. And I think she was responding, mostly, to that.

People tell you that you will barely remember your wedding. That it goes by in such a blur. But I remember our wedding. Not the whole day, in its entirety, but there are moments, perfectly preserved moments, that I remember with absolute clarity. Keith's face as I came toward him down the aisle. My daddy's kiss on my cheek. Tears in my mother's eyes. I remember hugs and congratulations. Beaming smiles. Dancing. And dancing. And dancing. Glances and touches. Whispers. Shouts. Words. Beloved faces. There are so many moments that stand out to me.

And I remember, most of all, the feeling. The feeling I had all day and well into the night. It was too strong to say it was mere giddiness. Too sweet to call it just excitement. Too boisterous to consider it only gladness. Would it be overreaching to describe it as transcendent? No, I don't think so. I think it was absolutely transcendent. A kind of transcendent joy that I'd only experienced in hints and murmurs before. And I was completely consumed by it, lit from within, on fire with it.

It was a perfect night. Do all bride's feel like their weddings are perfect? Maybe. Probably. I hope so. Ours truly was, in every way. There was nothing out of place. Nothing wasted. Every word, every face, every step, every touch was destined, ordained, blessed. It was like something from a fairy tale- the good and true kind of fairytale, where there is so much at stake, but the hero is brave and strong, and love is triumphant. It was magical and beautiful and thrilling and real.

We didn't have a professional video made, but we do have the ceremony's audio recorded. It came up on my iPod yesterday and I was reminded again just how perfect- how right and true and good -each word was for us. I relived that transcendent feeling. I remembered how this life can be, is meant to be, full of Grace and Truth. And I remembered, in the words of Frederick Buechner (words we used in our wedding ceremony), "that here and there even in our world and now and then even in ourselves, we catch glimpses of a New Creation, which, fleeting as those glimpses are apt to be, give us hope both for this life and for whatever life may await us later on."

Wednesday's Words of Wisdom

And yet there are some things I would be willing to bet maybe even my life on. That life is grace, for instance – the givenness of it, the fathomlessness of it, the endless possibilities of its becoming transparent to something extraordinary beyond itself. That whether you call on him or don’t call on him, God will be present with you. That if we really had our eyes open, we would see that all moments are key moments. That he who does not love remains in death. That Jesus is the Word made flesh who dwells among us full of grace and truth. 

That here and there even in our world and now and then even in ourselves, we catch glimpses of a New Creation, which, fleeting as those glimpses are apt to be, give us hope both for this life and for whatever life may await us later on. 

What's lost is nothing to what's found, and all the death that ever was, set next to life, would scarcely fill a cup.

-Frederick Buechner

New Blog Crush

When it comes to attraction, I guess I have a taste for the "nerdy". Giles on Buffy the Vampire Slayer can make my little heart flutter merely by polishing his glasses. I have a thing for bow-ties and suspenders (just ask my husband). I think a library is an incredibly romantic setting. There is nothing so captivating to me as a love of books, a wide vocabulary, and an active mind. Well-read, well-spoken, opinionated...it gets me every time. So it seems almost inevitable that this man would win a place in my heart.

John E. McIntyre writes a delightful blog for the Baltimore Sun. And he's my new crush. Go read....now!

Fall is Flirting

What a morning! The temperature is hovering somewhere around fifty-four degrees and there's a lovely crisp chill to the air. The sun is shining with that perfect angle, just the right slant to light the whole world all hazy-golden and gleaming.

I would love to be outside today. The first-fruits of fall are calling me like a siren's song. But there is work to be done, and I'm tethered to a desk and a computer screen and responsibilities.

I would love to be hanging fall decorations. Festoons of crisp colorful leaves and scarecrows and pumpkins. But the decorations are tucked in the attic, and the entrance to the attic is through the guest-room closet, and the guest-room closet is blocked with those last three boxes I never got around to unpacking after Keith and I married, plus another whole stack of boxes waiting for the garage sale that I have yet to organize.

I would love to be trying out this recipe. But it is full of flour and sugar and fat and all kinds of other delicious things that I shouldn't be eating right now.

Yet fall is flirting with me, and maybe, just maybe, thinking about staying. There will be time, there will be days, for basking in the briskness, and prettying up the house, and baking tasty treats. I'll content myself, for now, with gazing through wide open windows, and lighting a pumpkin spice candle when I get home tonight.

New Deathly Hallows Trailer

Oh, how I love the Harry Potter series! I suppose it's time to start the seventh (or is it eighth) re-read so the books are fresh in my mind before Part One of Deathly Hallows comes out in November. A new trailer was released yesterday. Have you seen it?

Do you love it? Is it November yet? Why can't it be November yet?

I was hooked on Harry Potter after being forced to watch the Prisoner of Azkaban at the dollar theater with some friends. Yes, I was a little late to that party (blame my innate suspicion of all things hyped) but I have more than made up for it since with incessant revisiting of both the books and the movies. I think they are exceptional story-telling.

Keith was also a little skeptical of HP at first. His first encounter with the series was the book, Prisoner of Azkaban, for a children's lit class in seminary. He was initially turned off by the trio's blatant rule breaking, their constant defiance of authority, and the exceptions and allowances made by those authorities on their part because Harry is (or is he?) the Chosen One. Seemed to Keith that this did not set a very good example for children and young adults to follow.

Of course, on closer consideration, you realize that while the trio certainly are not rule-followers, they do display excellent moral character- standing up for the weak, the marginalized, befriending house elves and half-giants. The children show remarkable lack of bias, insatiable curiosity, compassion towards others, and of course, strength of character- all of which are essential to the events of the final book. Harry, Ron and Hermione have to be willing to break some rules when it comes to standing up against the authority of the ministry of magic. They have to be curious enough and strong enough to keep fighting as the fight gets more and more dangerous and demoralizing. They have to remember and respect the rights and freedoms of those they're fighting for- muggles and centaurs and house-elves and just regular old witches and wizards.

The heroes of Harry Potter are true heroes. And while the books may not encourage strict rule-keeping they do constantly embody virtues like goodness, kindness and mercy; friendship and bravery and learning. And when you consider that strict rule following can lead directly to things like the Death Eater's rule or even Nazi Germany, well, I think I'd rather raise children who have strong moral character than children who fall in line and are afraid to make waves in the face of troubling circumstances. All that to say, I think Harry, Ron and Hermione make fine role models and I am more than willing for my children to read about them, love them, and emulate them when the time comes.